Saturday, 27 May 2017


One of the stupidest movies of all time produced by the guys at Troma Films. who are renowned for producing B grade crap of the highest order. This one is so crappy it actually becomes quite funny in a "Cant take my eyes off the car crash" type of way.

The plot follows the exploits of halpless nerd Melvin who just can't seem to catch a break, he works a crappy job cleaning at the local gym and is the brunt of all jokes until one day a prank goes too far and Melvin is humiliated beyond all belief and dives out the window into a conveniently placed vat of toxic waste and is transformed into the Toxic Avenger ... A mutant hero of superhuman strength and subhuman intelligence, who goes about fighting crime in his own unique but violent and hilarious way.

As you can no doubt guess this is nothing to be taken too seriously, it's kitchy as all hell and much of the violence (whilst earning it an R rating in Australia) is cartoon-ish in nature, many of the sight gags are pretty much lifted out of Saturday morning cartoons but infused with high level blood and guts. In fact that's how I'd describe the Toxic Avenger, as an ultra violent cartoon shot on film, complete with goofy sound effects and cheesy dialogue / accents.

Overall I think it's definately worth watching once, its a good laugh if you can get past the cheesiness of it all, and I quite enjoyed the film back int he 90's when I first saw it and this time when re-watching it I have to admit it was a pretty fun watch for a run through 20 + years later. Mindless, retarded fun.

Anyway I've included the video link from Youtube below for your viewing pleasure

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Friday, 26 May 2017

SEE NO EVIL (2006)

First up I must apologise for the slackness in not having done a review for the last couple of weeks, but sometimes life gets in the way... Plus after re-watching Halloween last time there's no point in watching anything directly after it as lets face it, few things really compare to that. It was in that spirit that I approached "See No Evil" expecting nothing

See No Evil was produced by the WWE team (yes the wresting dudes) and stars wrestling superstar "Kane"... I have to say I was a bit dubious but I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by this one!

This film while not making it into the "masterpiece" category is quite solid and enjoyable. The production is pretty good actually (well I guess they do have the budget and technology readily available). The acting is as solid as needs be for a film like this and no obvious plot holes. In fact it kind of reminds me of the "Friday 13th" vibe with yet another abusive mother daughter relationship relationship resulting in a twisted offspring turning into a demented killer. The violence is ramped up a few levels and when compared to something like "Friday 13th" and some of the gore effects are actually quite stunningly macabre (the emptied eye sockets particularly impressed me) so not a film for the squeamish or newbies to horror.

The plot itself revolves around a group of teenagers who are out on a "work for parole" type deal from their local correctional facility and are tasked with doing some fix-it work around a delapitated old hotel run by a seemingly sweet old lady. Of course as fate (and many slasher film plots) would have it she's hiding a dark secret in the form of her retarded but blood-lusting son Jacob, played disturbingly well by wrestler Kane, The kids are instructed to stay in their rooms after dark but of course go wandering, in search of hidden loot, and of course run into trouble when confronted by demented Jacob, who one by one sets out to slaughter the lot of them.

Over all its a cool watch, nothing revolutionary as it uses many of the same plot devices as countless slasher / teen flicks that came before it but I found it quite enjoyable and the horror scenes were really well done in my opinion

The movie is available to rent on you tube and probably quite easily available in the bargain bin at your local video store or flea market!

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Friday, 12 May 2017


Halloween is one of my all time favourate films, not just me but the horror world in general applaud this film as one of the all time classics of horror. It was shot in 1978 by John Carpenter (on a slim budget of $300,000 I understand) and grossed over 70 million worldwide, and no wonder ... It is a captivating tale, brilliantly shot and produced and as a slasher / horror / suspense flick it keeps the viewer engrossed and on the edge of their seat the whole way through this experience.

I'm probably going over familiar ground with most horror fans in detailing the plot but it focus' in on Mike Myers who brutally stabbed his sister to death as a child and was subsequently institutionalised for the following 15 years. He is then scheduled for a court appearance at age 21 (I assume) to assess whether he should be let out into the world but Mike somehow escapes (I'm not sure how he got out and I will concede this to me seems to be a bit of a plot hole) to return to his home town of Haddonfield where he starts preying on the teenagers of the town.

I guess this follows on from Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho in many ways but is the next generation of slasher flick with actual blood and some level of gore. It's by no means extreme, but it's a film that can cross over into the realms of non-horror fans quite well. Main star Jamie Lee Curtis (who oddly enough is the daughter of Janet Leigh of Psycho fame) as Laurie is stunningly beautiful and everyone in the film holds their ends up well meaning the film is believable and immensely watchable

I have to give props out to director John Carpenter as its a unique method of filming and his films always seem to be brilliantly executed and captivating from start to finish. I can't say enough good things about this film except that if you haven't watched it, go out and buy it now, its a must for any horror collection and if you haven't seen it in a while chuck it on again and relive the magic.

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Friday, 5 May 2017


Sitting somewhere between action and horror this slice of B grade action is not a bad little watch. A large rogue cop is running around killing random citizens on the streets and basically nobody can figure out who it is.

Starring Bruce Campbell as Jack, a police officer whose marriage is on the rocks, and his wife busts him in bed with another woman and then shows up dead as well... and of course Jack gets nicked for the murders, (to be fair the circumstances did point to him) until of course the killer keeps killing.

On first contact with the killer it appears that the killer maybe something more than human after withstanding a police gunfire attack. Further research points towards a violent ex police officer named "Cordell" who was previously assumed dead, after he was thrown into prison.

Style wise its another 80's action flick and obviously shot on a budget but its pretty well done and keeps the viewer interested while not an all time classic its pretty solid watch and has become something of a cult classic amongst the B grade set

Heres a copy of the film on youtube, it looks to be ripped straight from VHS too for that authentic feel!

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Wednesday, 3 May 2017


Well then,,,, this one has certainly gained a bad boy reputation around the internet as one of the nastiest films ever made, and to be fair I have to agree with them. The film itself has been banned in many countries including Germany (which says something) and has become the stuff of internet legend.

This IS without doubt one of the nastiest pieces of work to be put to film and sits firmly in the torture porn  genre bordering on snuff films..... Which makes me wonder if I ever saw a real snuff film would it be as abrasive as this film anyway? Did a film this graphic and disturbing need to be made? It was the same question I asked myself after watching Salo. For what its worth I think this is actually a good film, it is well shot, the acting is great and the violence is beyond graphic, probably more so than the real thing. Plot wise it is almost ingenious, which worries me even more because whoever directed this is sick, perverted bastard to even think of putting this stuff to film, but again I have to hand it to the bastard it is a great film well thought out and the plot development is fiendish and keeps you rivetted to the edge of your seat... While making you die a little inside from the fact that you want to keep watching such disturbing stuff. This is for only the most hardened of horror / movie fans... Again like Salo I'm not going to link it here but the more industrious of you guys and gals I'm sure will figure out a way to get it (It is available for online purchase) and on unscrupulous download sites as well.

The plot centres around Milosh a retired Serbian porno actor, who has met a great girl and started a family. Its been a few years since his last acting job and money is starting to run a little thin, so he agrees to one last job which he is told will be his big payout and set him and his family up for the rest of his life. The job is described as 'art porn' and Milosh starts to participate in the filming but is creeped by the first scene and the fact there is sexual violence and a child present on set and of course backs out.... He then wakes up a bloody beaten mess in his own bed and realises bit by bit that he had been drugged and forced to participate in a series of scenes so disgusting he can barely bring himself to remember them. What has happened to the film crew? His family? Co-stars? It is of course a grizzly, sick, perverted mess as Milosh backtracks the grim events that led him to where he is now... But I'll leave that up to you guys to find out if you dare to watch the film

This is a trip into the sick perverted world of child porn / rape  and snuff films and the vile creatures that create this stuff... it is by no means is it pretty. Again like I said this film isn't for everyone, and it I actually wonder if the director of this film should be put on a watch list of some sort. But it was a captivating and grim watch.

I died a little inside.

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